just these words i've been mumbling for days...
2007-11-11 - 2:36 p.m.
This dichotomy is tearing my mind apart. Everything is being ripped in half, and I feel like being confrontational, but when I confront you, I lose my nerve and the words are all swallowed in a hundred shades of black in the deepest cavern in the human soul. I told you I loved you, and I thought it was enough, but my heart feels like it has a porcelain chip in it. These words walked a thousand miles and froze themselves out. We'll listen to all these love song memories until we make ourselves nauseous on looking backwards all the time. If you found me beautiful, you weren't listening closely enough. I'm running towards you, and I'll show up in last place, but at least, I'll make it to the finish line. I'm just dying for a chance to stare into those eyes, and you know, I start to wonder if that's why I feel like I'm dying some days. The smell of cigarette smoke is starting to touch me, and I wonder why I wear my hair the way I do, and can you walk with me and drink in the stars to night? I'd walk the extra mile if it meant forever.
I don't know what it is I'm trying to say anymore, this seems all so extraneous.
Me.